Return From Folsom

Return From Folsom

In this week’s episode Clay & Todd talk about their trip to the Folsom Street Fair. Attending kink events can be overwhelming. Openly celebrating Kink & Queer culture is a beautiful thing to witness and take part in. How do you navigate trips like these?

the Folsom Street Fair: https://www.folsomstreet.org/

Breathe Toys: https://www.breathetoys.com/

Knotty Productions: https://www.knottyproductions.com/

Dumpling Time - Design District: https://www.dumplingtime.com/design-district

Return From Folsom Episode transcript

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We went to Folsom.

Yes, we went to Folsom.

It was pretty cool.

It was really cool.

I was under the impression that Folsom, the street fair was going to be like Saturday and Sunday, but apparently it was just Sunday, which is fine.

I think I just would have changed my expectations, prepared a bit, and made you have us there earlier in the day.

Yeah, it was our first time going.

Yeah.

So we didn't know what was up.

Yeah.

And there were a lot of associated things going on at different places that are part of the community.

So they were happening Friday and Saturday.

And so, and because our friends that had booths, or were performing at Folsom, they were so busy and they didn't have time to like, give us the full rundown on what to expect.

I think we just kind of went with the information that we had.

And of course, since there's so much going on having to do with Folsom, the information is kind of scattered, not centralized, and so to get a timeline of what might be occurring, when and where is actually kind of not easy to do.

No.

Yeah.

So we were winging it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And trying not to stress ourselves out or like, we had some expectations and then just like, had very few expectations for other things because we just simply didn't know what anything was going to be about or be like.

So why make expectations that are sure to crumble in front of you?

Because you don't know about, you don't know what's going on.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You can't make expectations for something that you have no information about.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We did have tickets to a Twisted Windows thing on Saturday.

We went to town a bit earlier, expecting there to be actual street fair stuff going on.

And of course, there was not.

The street was blocked off in preparation for the following day.

But we were there a bit early, but it gave us a chance to go find good food.

And we did find, of course, pretty good food.

What was it called?

Dumpling time?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Really good dumplings.

Really, really good.

We went there twice.

And then we went to the Twisted Windows performance, hung out with some friends that had just got to town.

The Twisted Windows event was like, I was expecting the bondage stage that they would have on the Sunday of the street fair.

I was expecting some stages outside event type of thing, but it was an indoor event, non-alcoholic, sober, nighttime, almost soiree club environment, which I was not prepared for in my mind until getting there and being like, well, I wouldn't have worn the outfit that I wore.

It was funny.

Well, one of our friends, when we finally met up with them, they were like, I was complimenting their outfit, and they were like, don't you look like you're from Oregon?

And I was like, I would have worn something different had I known what I was getting into.

Yeah, like the places around here when they have-

Around here as in Eugene?

Yeah, in Eugene.

It's got much more of a wear whatever you want, throw on some kink gear maybe.

It's got burlesque vibes a lot of the time.

Yeah.

This was more of a art gallery.

Yeah.

Local queer kink.

Is it called SOMA?

SOMA Arts.

SOMA Arts Center.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it was a gallery.

So like gallery lighting and mood lighting, and people were wearing very nice outfits, and decked out in some of their coolest shit, and I wore my dirty jean shorts and a cut-off tank top.

Yeah.

And dirty boots as well, which would be totally appropriate for any event in Eugene.

Yeah.

100%.

And I'm sure it was, in some ways, in technical terms, appropriate.

Showing up comfortably is appropriate wherever, except for maybe a wedding, I guess.

I don't know.

It was different vibes than what I was expecting.

It was really cool to watch and to see people.

But I certainly felt the pressure, the shame that comes with like, I've worn white to someone else's wedding type of like, fashion faux pas type of stress that.

Well, it was really cool.

Like if we had been prepared, it would have been much better, much more comfortable to be there.

But it was really cool to see kink in queer culture elevated in that setting.

In that way.

Instead of like a bar show where it's like an afterthought, it's like a couple days a month, they might set aside time to include these people in the community, you know, from the communities.

But yeah, this was like centered on that those communities and the way they intersect.

So that was beautiful.

Yeah.

I wish we had known more about the setting and the shows.

So we could have been more comfortable showing up for sure.

But I really enjoyed our moment of like, we did a thing where like, you know, when you go to the airport and you find your gate and then you go off and get food, go to the bathroom or whatever, just so you know where your gate is and that it exists.

We did the same thing where like, we found where the event was, it was not happening yet.

And we were like, great, it's there.

This is where we're going to be.

We went to go get food.

And of course, I had brought like extra clothes just in case I needed to change or anything.

I ended up not changing.

But you ended up taking off your shirt and putting on my leather vest, which was a fun moment before going to do this thing that I was feeling nervous about as I do.

And it added a lot of like levity and playfulness to it going in that I really, really appreciated.

Yeah.

You were...

I describe it.

I don't know if I would describe it like this, but we were almost like cleaning out in terms of a, oh yeah, turn around, let's see the outfit, put on the leather vest.

Do I look good?

I liked it a lot.

Once I put the vest on, I realized how much I need one of those.

I don't know.

I'll let you borrow it sometimes.

I'll let you borrow it if you want to borrow my vest.

And I don't know if it would be too much to be in matching vests.

We've been in matching outfits before.

Not planned to.

Since I don't have hair, I like to feel like I was letting my hair down in that way.

He took his hair out of his bun and shook it out.

But yeah, it was really nice.

A night on the town, much different than we had expected.

It was nice to see our friends for a moment.

Of course, they were in show mode.

They had a stage show the following day.

So they were wound up in, we had as expected.

They were in a whirlwind of things that they had to do, things that they had to see people to talk to.

And this was a night that they got to just enjoy themselves where they didn't really have any expectations.

So they were having a night out too, seeing their friends and stuff.

This entire weekend that we went to Folsom, we were staying in Santa Cruz, and we got a chance to have downtime and hang out on the beach, in a much more chill setting during the day.

And then when we'd go to San Francisco, of course, much more, much busier environment.

Stinkier too.

San Francisco was really stinky, the design district specifically.

Yeah.

Smelled like sewage.

Yeah.

Too many Teslas, too many cyber trucks.

Yeah.

I hate California drivers.

They're like, I'm already going 15 to 20 miles over the speed limit, and they need to go 30 to 40 miles over the speed limit.

And so they're like, get out of my way.

And it was nice to have that separation from big city to smaller coastal town vibe.

You know, to decompress and feel less pressure during a big event like that.

Yeah.

And when we did make it to Folsom, we were actually there just for the last couple of hours.

And immediately, you found yourself overwhelmed.

We put, I put the sensory deprivation hood on you.

Well, first, we made our way through what was like a block and a half of street fair, which took one million years because of the sheer density of crowd.

And so it just, it felt like, all right, let's just find the Breathe Toys tent and find a home base and recalibrate and figure out what we want to do next.

And so we got there, we found the place and I sat down for an about an hour maybe like, yeah, I needed an hour to recalibrate.

I was way overwhelmed.

Yeah.

And Eli was really helpful.

Oh yeah.

And helping you.

Eli immediately swept me up and was like, come over here and people watch with me.

And it was super grounding and good for my soul.

Really good for my soul.

And eventually we were like, okay, let's put the sensory deprivation hood on.

I put earplugs in and like immediately earplugs made the environment so much better.

I could feel and hear my own breathing and like, think thoughts rather than process all that was around me.

And so we sat at the tent with the hood on for a little bit, and then we decided to go for a walkabout.

And our walkabout consisted of simply walking back to the car, through the street fair.

And seeing if we could find food.

Oh, yeah.

But everything was starting to close down.

And I simply just did not want a sausage.

I didn't want a hot dog.

Not in this environment.

I really, really loved seeing what people showed up in, and that made their, you know, the choices that you make in what you're wearing to an event like this says a lot about your comfort and interests, and it says a lot about you.

And I just fucking adored everyone that I saw showing up, however, they felt comfortable and good to show up in and...

It's choosing to tell a story about yourself, an elaborate story that you choose, you know, not necessarily your actual life story, but these are the most beautiful, interesting parts of me, or a version of those things presented in this tidy little package.

It's hot.

You're often hot package.

Sometimes it was just like, I don't know, they had like a whole ass costume, basically, that wasn't necessarily like kink or fet gear, that was just like, okay, yeah, that's your character that you're doing right now.

Slay.

Yeah.

And of course, you had one million gay men in chest harnesses and a jockstrap.

Boring, come up with a different outfit.

At least there was some that chose to not wear the jockstrap and they were just letting it dangle.

Sometimes they were stroking it.

Winnie the Pooh-ing it.

Shirt cocking it.

There were certainly a number of creepy men that were there.

Some minding their business, some not so much minding their business.

I wish we had gone down all of the different streets to see all of the, you know, the pup play parts.

And I feel like there was also like a piss, like piss alley or something.

Like, I don't know.

It would have been fun to see more of it, but we, I was just so overloaded.

Well, and this thing is like, we didn't know what to expect.

And we actually, we got there just in time to figure out, start to figure out how to exist in that space, especially during times of overwhelm, which is for plenty of people in the kink community, a big part of it.

Like how to navigate being overwhelmed with so many fucking people around you.

I think much more, if we had gone there earlier in the day, it very well might have been too much, just because we had to almost immediately find our way out of that space, go get food and reset.

Had we had the time, we might have been able to come back, but who knows?

Important part is we got to get a taste of Folsom, and next time...

We're prepared.

Next time we're prepared, between now and then we will attend other events and have a better idea as to what we want to wear, what we want to definitely experience, and we will have a plan of action.

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